I've been trying to look for connections as to why I feel this way today. Perhaps, it's the aftershock (one week later, might I add) of losing my phone, and finding it again. Maybe, it's the unbelievably bipolar and crazy weather here in the Philippines.. Or maybe, it's the pressure of facing the unknown after college.. If I will even graduate due to all these academic stress I've been feeling lately. I'm confused and tired.. as hell. But amidst all that, you're there. You're always there.
You might find it funny, but I will never forget that day when we were riding this insanely hot car and I was kind of bitching at you, you were sweating so much, and yet, you found it in you to ask me if I'm okay. I'm probably a lot fine as compared to how you looked, but point is, you put me first. You are always there for me.. That time I lost my phone, you didn't even think about it.. you volunteered to help me buy a new phone. That lowest point in my life when my Nanay left us, you told me that even if you were never as close to her as I was, you still love her cause she loved me, and I to her. That time when you thought you lost me, and you cried so much. That time when my favorite pair of flats got soaked in water, and you made me wear your shoes, then you gladly walked barefoot inside the mall, and dried my shoes. That time during my debut when you felt so bad cause you thought you dishonored my Dad..
You are the greatest partner, ever. No amount of shortcomings nor flaws would ever erase that. As for the connection, I don't know. I guess you are just everywhere.. in my laptop, in my room, in the clothes I wear, in my thoughts, in my heart.
Inspite of everything and because of everything, I love you even more now.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Cute Pugs, Animo Spirit and Missed Polaroid
One thing I love about college is the UAAP season. Truth be told, at first, I wasn't really much of a fan. I just really go through with it for the reason that my best friend is insanely addicted to it. He'd go ranting about it for hours, I tell you! Soon enough, because of his persistence, I became familiar with it.. The players, the game, the rivalry. It all got to me eventually. To my complete horror or amusement (I couldn't decide yet, lol), I even catch myself looking forward to the next televised game! This is if we weren't watching live.. Watching live tends to be a tedious task, though.. For the reason that scalpers buy most of the tickets.
Moving on, it's that time of the season again! Admit it. There's nothing like a good Ateneo and La Salle Rivalry. For some reasons, it's always much more intense and personal for the Blue Eagles and the Green Archers. As a Lasallian, though, as much as I love and believe on my own, I also have high regards to the Blue Eagles.. I'm pretty sure a lot of Lasallians shares the same sentiment as me. The energy, the crowd, the chants.. There's really, truly nothing like it.
So, when the opportunity came for another DLSU vs ADMU game, V and I decided for a stay in camp (for the reason that the tickets were hoarded by annoying but clever scalpers, hehe) with the most lovable pug ever right after catching Stephen Chbosky's Perks Of Being A Wallflower in the theater! Nothing like a good company while watching a good rivalry match, aye? Anyway, it was indeed a tough fight. At the start of fourth quarter, DLSU was even leading by 11 points. However, like I said, there really is nothing like a good rivalry. Ateneo's Ravena managed to catch up eventually, and man.. Catch up, he did! It may sting (a bit) that we lost, but I really believe that next year will be our year! ;)
Anyway, Sweden's photo-op!
Anyway, as you can see, half-ly, V and I were wearing our DLSU shirts while cheering for the team! For some reasons, it feels much more legit that way. Afterwards, V and I had a quick dinner at his place, then he brought me back to my place.
Moving on, it's that time of the season again! Admit it. There's nothing like a good Ateneo and La Salle Rivalry. For some reasons, it's always much more intense and personal for the Blue Eagles and the Green Archers. As a Lasallian, though, as much as I love and believe on my own, I also have high regards to the Blue Eagles.. I'm pretty sure a lot of Lasallians shares the same sentiment as me. The energy, the crowd, the chants.. There's really, truly nothing like it.
So, when the opportunity came for another DLSU vs ADMU game, V and I decided for a stay in camp (for the reason that the tickets were hoarded by annoying but clever scalpers, hehe) with the most lovable pug ever right after catching Stephen Chbosky's Perks Of Being A Wallflower in the theater! Nothing like a good company while watching a good rivalry match, aye? Anyway, it was indeed a tough fight. At the start of fourth quarter, DLSU was even leading by 11 points. However, like I said, there really is nothing like a good rivalry. Ateneo's Ravena managed to catch up eventually, and man.. Catch up, he did! It may sting (a bit) that we lost, but I really believe that next year will be our year! ;)
Anyway, Sweden's photo-op!
Isn't Sweden the cutest little pug ever?
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiyaaaaaaaa, I'm sleepy" - Sweden
Sweden and I! Love, love, love :)
Ahhh, dying!! ❤
And lastly, polaroid shots! Can you see which polaroid fails? Lol, obviously, it's the one with the fountain. V's house boy accidentally left me out from the frame.. I'm pretty sure it's not intentional, I think.. Maybe.. Heh, kidding.
Lovely, lovely day.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Sometimes, a title sticks with you just because.
Mind you, I'm a very forgetful person. I should probably blame it to old age, but I've only lived two decades on Earth so far. Yup. I'm very forgetful like that. But when a person strikes me and captures my attention, I would probably remember that person for the rest of my life. Take for an instance, the girl who constantly wore her old school's uniform to my university, which has no dress code policy, for the rest of her freshmen year. Or the boy who was so unbelievably cocky, I hated him the moment I met him. Or the kind sir who dutifully shows up with the biggest smile ever everyday in my university's canteen so he can clean up the mess of some spoiled college kids in exchange for scraps and what nots. Sometimes, I don't even know the person's name, but titles stick with me like that.
Don't laugh at me, but I don't really remember why I wrote those stuff up there. Probably because I remember visiting this girl's blog which reminded me of my mine. Her blog title is really catchy, and I'm sort of asking myself why I didn't think of it in the first place. I just find it so fitting with how I see people, and how I think of them.
Don't laugh at me, but I don't really remember why I wrote those stuff up there. Probably because I remember visiting this girl's blog which reminded me of my mine. Her blog title is really catchy, and I'm sort of asking myself why I didn't think of it in the first place. I just find it so fitting with how I see people, and how I think of them.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Six months and ten days later
"Melda! Aimee, Lea, Jejo!! Lea!!!"
In my old household, that's one phrase you'd hear quite a lot. Every single day, actually. It's funny. You'd think living with the same people for over twenty years would actually mean that the names of said people would forever be embedded on one's heart. Well, forever until old age creeps to one. So, before anything else, let me all tell you how hard this is for me. Hard in a sense that I don't have any single idea what to write, but it seems that I feel each and every emotion there is to feel about this. They say once you start writing, words just come to you. Well, not in this case.
Everyone, meet my Nanay. Ever since I was born, I have lived with her. I have shared my first bath, first meal, first step, first word, and many more uncountable other firsts with her. She was my yaya's matrona, our household's greatest cook ever, and the stingiest person I have ever known. Relatively speaking though.. She was my Grandmom, and she loved us all with all her heart.
It was during the World War II when my Grandmom and my Grandfather met. My Grandmom was one of the many people who tried her hardest to avoid the bad, and to save the good. And well, just like in every cliched love story, one of the good was my Grandfather. My Grandmom had saved her future husband and tended to his wounds. It wasn't that long until they fell in love with each other, and decided to get married just after the war finished. Together, my Grandmom and Grandfather had seven children together with their names starting from Amparo (My Grandmom), Benedicto (My Grandfather), Carmencita, Daniel, Enriquito, Florencito, Gavellana, Heidi, and Imelda (My Mother). I know what you're thinking. Although it is kind of funny, don't laugh. It's actually pretty clever for me. Anyway, have I mentioned they married when my Grandfather was just 17, and my Grandmom was 19? Wild right? But apparently, that's how it was back then. So as a young couple, one of the many crisis they overcame as a family was when my Grandmom had to sew thousands of clothes just so she can send my Grandfather to college. Imagine a teenage mom working on thousands of clothes to sew for the rich while she's tending on her kids and sending her husband to school. Hard? Well, repeat that six more times - Three of which (including my Grandfather and my mother) finished and passed the Board exam thus the CPA title, one finished Medicine and now owns of the biggest hospital in Washington, while the rest finished their degree in the University of The Philippines and got their Masterals abroad. Imagine.. All that from a single, bony, stingy lady I call my Nanay? She was a superwoman.
Years later, my siblings and I entered her life. While my parents were building their own careers, my siblings and I were stuck under my Grandmom's care. Through those years, my siblings and I have created a special bond with our Grandmom not even our aunt and aunties have. Though it pains me so much sometimes, I remember a lot. I remember playing horse with her beloved sofa, and you know what she'd do? She'd just let the annoying little me be. She'd always prefer us to stay inside rather than to go out. She had the patience of a god. I remember arguing with her every day for the whole summer of my middle school life, just because I didn't want to take my afternoon naps. She'd get mad at me then, but would eventually get me to sleep anyway. I remember running away from her whenever she'd scare us with her ever so famous baseball bat when my siblings and I would do something so incredibly foolish but amazing for a ten year old. I remember going to the wet market with her, and how she'd ask for a special discount price cause she's a (*quote*) valued customer (*unquote*) . I remember her chasing after and eventually shouting at my old fat bus driver, just cause he'd always make me sit on something hot.. which eventually got me confined in the hospital. I remember her making me drink all of her teas on one local family trip just cause my stomach was all upset. I remember her giving me an exact Php 1000 bill so that I can go shopping before my flight to Vancouver, Canada. I remember her giving my siblings and I twenty bucks everyday for school in addition to what my parents give us. I remember her cooking all of my favorite food whenever I'm sick. I remember her holding my hand and staring at me intently.. Not talking, but just staring.. As if she can't believe I grew up to be the girl I am today. And though it hurts, I feel the need to tell you that that was the last time I saw her warm and alive. Most importantly, I remember her telling my siblings and I how much she loves us.. Perhaps not everyday, but on special occasions and once every quarter moon.
I'd describe her now as something, but I feel like every single word that comes to me right now doesn't really compensate to what she was. How exactly do you regard someone whom you'd never thought you'd lose? I know everyone dies, but to her, it never came to me that one day, she'd pass away. Though it hurts so much that she's gone, I know that I will always carry her with me. So here I am.. Six months and ten days later.. Trying to type all these jumbled thoughts in my head. I thought as time passes by, everything becomes easier. But what I have come to realize is that pain doesn't really go away.. We just learn to live with it. Up to this day, whenever I'd think of her, I feel as if she's still alive somewhere. Somewhere, but alive. And in a way, I know it's true. She's alive up there guarding over all of us.
I still can't find all the right words to say now, but I'll leave it to this: Thank you for everything, Nanay. I love you always.
In my old household, that's one phrase you'd hear quite a lot. Every single day, actually. It's funny. You'd think living with the same people for over twenty years would actually mean that the names of said people would forever be embedded on one's heart. Well, forever until old age creeps to one. So, before anything else, let me all tell you how hard this is for me. Hard in a sense that I don't have any single idea what to write, but it seems that I feel each and every emotion there is to feel about this. They say once you start writing, words just come to you. Well, not in this case.
Everyone, meet my Nanay. Ever since I was born, I have lived with her. I have shared my first bath, first meal, first step, first word, and many more uncountable other firsts with her. She was my yaya's matrona, our household's greatest cook ever, and the stingiest person I have ever known. Relatively speaking though.. She was my Grandmom, and she loved us all with all her heart.
Years later, my siblings and I entered her life. While my parents were building their own careers, my siblings and I were stuck under my Grandmom's care. Through those years, my siblings and I have created a special bond with our Grandmom not even our aunt and aunties have. Though it pains me so much sometimes, I remember a lot. I remember playing horse with her beloved sofa, and you know what she'd do? She'd just let the annoying little me be. She'd always prefer us to stay inside rather than to go out. She had the patience of a god. I remember arguing with her every day for the whole summer of my middle school life, just because I didn't want to take my afternoon naps. She'd get mad at me then, but would eventually get me to sleep anyway. I remember running away from her whenever she'd scare us with her ever so famous baseball bat when my siblings and I would do something so incredibly foolish but amazing for a ten year old. I remember going to the wet market with her, and how she'd ask for a special discount price cause she's a (*quote*) valued customer (*unquote*) . I remember her chasing after and eventually shouting at my old fat bus driver, just cause he'd always make me sit on something hot.. which eventually got me confined in the hospital. I remember her making me drink all of her teas on one local family trip just cause my stomach was all upset. I remember her giving me an exact Php 1000 bill so that I can go shopping before my flight to Vancouver, Canada. I remember her giving my siblings and I twenty bucks everyday for school in addition to what my parents give us. I remember her cooking all of my favorite food whenever I'm sick. I remember her holding my hand and staring at me intently.. Not talking, but just staring.. As if she can't believe I grew up to be the girl I am today. And though it hurts, I feel the need to tell you that that was the last time I saw her warm and alive. Most importantly, I remember her telling my siblings and I how much she loves us.. Perhaps not everyday, but on special occasions and once every quarter moon.
I'd describe her now as something, but I feel like every single word that comes to me right now doesn't really compensate to what she was. How exactly do you regard someone whom you'd never thought you'd lose? I know everyone dies, but to her, it never came to me that one day, she'd pass away. Though it hurts so much that she's gone, I know that I will always carry her with me. So here I am.. Six months and ten days later.. Trying to type all these jumbled thoughts in my head. I thought as time passes by, everything becomes easier. But what I have come to realize is that pain doesn't really go away.. We just learn to live with it. Up to this day, whenever I'd think of her, I feel as if she's still alive somewhere. Somewhere, but alive. And in a way, I know it's true. She's alive up there guarding over all of us.
I still can't find all the right words to say now, but I'll leave it to this: Thank you for everything, Nanay. I love you always.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Thoughts of a Bookworm
(While waiting for her mom's confirmation for her Kindle Touch...)
- Why aren't you replying yet?!!!! Please reply asap!! This is a matter of life and death!!!
- I need an inhaler!! I CANNOT breathe!!! My heart!!!
- TEARS......... OF JOY!!!
Not everybody close to me knows how much I love reading. Maybe it's because of my self-confessed ~"Jeje"~ past (which you can find on my Friendster.. if that site still exists), my xanga blogs (So help me, Lord. I know I deleted ALL of it!!!) and/or maybe, it's just because of my laziness to everything that doesn't include or is not related to reading. Ever since I was a kid, I loved reading. I remember sneaking in all those Hardy Boy series my uncles and aunties abroad would send me. Encyclopedias, back when Wikipedia was still a baby internet fetus, would always fascinate me. I loved book sales and book bazaars so much, my parents had to drag me out (sometimes or maybe most of the time, okay). I loved smelling that certain smell of new books.. and old books too! I loved reading romance, thriller, action, horror, erotica (lol joke), and other genres. I have always loved using my imagination, too. For me, there is nothing like a book worm's kind of smart. Nothing, I tell you. The sarcasm, the idiomatic expressions, the metaphors, the grammar.. It is a lifestyle.
I guess, this is partly why I can understand and speak English eloquently. Well, maybe not as eloquent as others, but surely.. I know the difference between your and you're. I also know that eating is spelled with a single T (Yes, I have a friend *gasp* who spells eating with two Ts, and yes *another gasp* she graduated highschool) and that there is no such thing as stuffs since stuff is already plural. Forgive me for the sudden grammar lecture, but humor me. Hehe. :-) I really believe that I owe it all to reading books - My knowledge when it comes to grammar, my perspective on things, my way with language. If it weren't for books, I don't know who or what I'd be today.
So thank you, books. Thank you for the knowledge! You don't have any idea how happy I am to finally have a kindle touch so that my imagination can have endless trips to basically everywhere you'd take me. And despite the fact that I already have an electronic book, do not fret, my dear. I promise to always and forever support the printed words!! I love you, and thank you. ♥
I guess, this is partly why I can understand and speak English eloquently. Well, maybe not as eloquent as others, but surely.. I know the difference between your and you're. I also know that eating is spelled with a single T (Yes, I have a friend *gasp* who spells eating with two Ts, and yes *another gasp* she graduated highschool) and that there is no such thing as stuffs since stuff is already plural. Forgive me for the sudden grammar lecture, but humor me. Hehe. :-) I really believe that I owe it all to reading books - My knowledge when it comes to grammar, my perspective on things, my way with language. If it weren't for books, I don't know who or what I'd be today.
So thank you, books. Thank you for the knowledge! You don't have any idea how happy I am to finally have a kindle touch so that my imagination can have endless trips to basically everywhere you'd take me. And despite the fact that I already have an electronic book, do not fret, my dear. I promise to always and forever support the printed words!! I love you, and thank you. ♥
(Yes, I just talked to my books.. Hehe)
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